Lie...

I always thought it is a lie... thought it is something untruth, it is not trustworthy...

An unfortunate year have passed, but after that then only I know what she told might not be a lie.
It might be something truth, just that I don't want to believe it...

Wonder what will happen on the 1st anniversary of the day I cry so hard and insomnia for few days.
And also wonder what will happen few weeks after that, which is my 21st birthday...

I know I shouldn't care so much about my past... But it is a very big portion in my memory...
If there is a time machine that can give me 2nd chance, I hope at least she won't "lie" to me again...

public, protected, private

We have Java OOEP class yesterday, and lecturer have teach us about the meaning of "public", "protected" and "private"...

After the class, we have badminton to play because Fang Zhou have book a badminton court. He have book for 5pm time slot. But when we at there, there is another people playing... so, we chit-chat for a while...


Soo Hwah: Where you got the racket?
Teng Lai: It is my housemate's racket, they have back to hometown.
Soo Hwah: What? you just took it?
Teng Lai: They left it in living room, so it is belong to "public".

(LOL, that is the real meaning of "public" XD )

Me: Oh, is that mean everything that locked in their room are "protected"? Those ball on the ground is belong to "private" or "public"?

(Another LOL)

Believe me, it is really funny at that time~ XD

Beauty

Irresistible... this is the best term can be use on me when I "found" a beauty...

Is she become prettier day by day? Or she is just as beautiful as always??
Everytime when look at her, I'm like getting more and more attract to her...

Why Why Why???

I still have phobia on "that kind" of feeling... I still can't get rid of it...
Even though it is a history now, but I don't want "she" become the person same like "her"... and at the end, I have to face the same thing again...

She is too good to me... is like a luxury that I can't afford, not easy to accessible, only capable look far away...

Just hope I won't lose control... and do anything inappropriate...

Flat...

I dislike music that sounds flat, ironically my life is flat...

Flat in the stance that, I'm not very bad in everything, but in the same time, nothing is outstanding...

Maybe that is why my friend said I'm "low profile"... not many people recognise me, and some don't even know who am I...

Choose:
Either to hate me
Or to forget about me...




Is there a third choice??

悪いなジーン

This sounds like "不機嫌なジーン" (Fukigen na Gene) in Japanese Drama...

But I have "Bad gene"... a genetic that made everyone dislike me...

I think I have rely on "someone" too much, until I always think of her, always want to chat with her, I miss her when she is not around...
What kind of feeling is this??

Maybe I have talk too much, until I have said something that I shouldn't said......
And now... I also don't know what is happening......

Is this my New Year's present?? Perhaps...